CONCERN OVER OFFICIAL STATS

By Lachlan Hot Pants

In a startling move, Battered Sav Captain and self appointed selector, Arjuna, has come out defending the recent addition of statistical analysis as part of the selection criteria. A number of players have come out and attacked the recent additions to the process noteably Tempter, Dabbs and Hairbear. When Arjuna was queried as to the comments being made by these players the only response that came forward was that "it's a real suprise that the players who aren't quite stacking up numerically are ranting and raving in order to catch the eye of the finals selection committee.

Stats leaders tucan and hollywood were both approached for an interview, with both players shrugging of rumours rather choosing to focus on there strong numbers and build on them over the finals campaign. Tucan said "Dabs can stick his numbers up my arse as far as I'm concerned. I can only remember Tempter being hit around the park like Hurricane Katrina and has been more than lucky in taking one wicket. Grouch is the big improver anf Arjuna has alot to prove on thursday night."

Michael, or otherwise Kel has really stood out with his recent bowling performances as has reebs with tidy statistics at either end. Selectors are reportedly looking closely at Sneaky and Slicks poor numbers and will take up coming performances into account said, Arjuna. In other news, Apoo has been voted as sexiest wicket keeper in the world by a group of 5 indian women.